i guess

leaving is harder than i thought.

after a long hiatus and now that i’ve finally got some time to think and reflect about all that’s happened to me- wow. i can’t even believe that i’m going to a uni. that too carnegie mellon. other than crippling thoughts of how i’ll afford this, what is even happening, why can’t i control this etc etc, i guess i’ll just have to trust that i’ll be ok and that someone will want to hire me at the end of this crap hahah!

oh lordy lord. some direction please. maybe some indication that i’ll be able to pay $200k in student loans.

heaven help me!